As promised, here is a sample of another one of my writing projects.  This may or may not wind up being a one off comedy novel, I haven’t decided yet and it also depends on how the audience reacts.  So as the song goes… “Please allow me to introduce… Clausmodeus, the Devil’s Other Son”.  Enjoy…

Please allow me to introduce myself, I’m a man… AND I’M FUCKING PISSED OFF ABOUT IT!  Sorry about that… Oh great now I’m apologizing.  Look let me start over.  The name’s Clausmodeus, and I’m the son of the Devil.  No, don’t start that looking for the three sixes, sign-of-the-beast crap.  You’re thinking of my half-brother, the Anti-Jerk who’s supposed to bring about the Apocalypse.  I’m not into that garbage.  If you actually read the end of the big-incomplete-book, the bad guys lose and you all land up in heaven and we wind up with nothing.  Where’s the fun in that?

Nah, I like the world the way it is.  Sin and temptation are way more fun with you folks around.  I love seeing what new things you’ll come up with next, with a little help from me of course.  Plastic surgery for instance, that was one of my inventions.  Some people would sell their soul to look better and have others lusting after them.  Hey, a two-for-one deal.  Dad liked that one.  In fact he let me come home from Heaven early for it.  That’s where he usually sends me when I’ve pissed him off.

See, for a full-devil, being up there listening to tall that glorying and choir singing is the ultimate in boring.  But he forgets I’m only half-devil, or at least tries to.  He hates to admit that he nailed the wrong broad.   He was trying to spoil every virgin he could find when he realized God was getting ready to have his son come into the world.  Only Dad didn’t count on the big guy setting up a decoy using one of the female angels.   Thus, instead of thwarting the coming of the Christ, he wound up with me.  A Devil/Angel, or D’evgel if you like.

I can tell you right now, Dad didn’t like it.  Come to think of it, neither did his minions who laughed about it when they found out.  They’re still sore from what he did to them and that was over 2000 years ago.   Heh, my old-man can really get inventive sometimes when it comes to punishments.  Especially like the one he laid on me this time.

I still can’t believe it.  Me the son of the devil, stuck in a human body in Amish country.  I’m humble, meek, helpful, polite, don’t drink and don’t swear… the works.  And to top it off he gave me erectile dysfunction which means I can’t perform and all the women know about it.  So I have no chance of even getting married just to have sex once in a blue moon.  Talk about a sore-head.  And I didn’t even do anything to deserve getting punished… this time.

Here, let me go back and start over from the beginning…

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